Heartwarming & Heartbreak
I’m writing this to you with a slightly foggy brain, dear readers, but am committed to showing up here today! I have so much to share with you. I cannot promise I’ll share it the most eloquently. I’m not sure I’ve drawn any grand conclusions about everything October/Early November held. And, I’ve been “off the grid” for almost two weeks now, so this is where I’m dipping my toe back in. 😊
October was wild and wonderful in many ways, full of community and answered prayers and unexpected gifts. I hope to celebrate all of them! As is often the case, it was also realistic and sad. And now I have COVID. 😂 But anyhow…
Wild and Wonderful
October was a season of so much goodness! Still Good Co. officially launched in person and online, and it was such a gift to share it with others. Our pop-up shops were wonderful! (See pictures here!) So many small businesses and loved ones came together to make it possible. It was really daunting to plan and put it all together, but I realized somewhere along the way: I wasn’t doing it alone. 🥰️ It was such a beautiful experience. Still Good Co. isn’t about t-shirt sales. While those t-shirts do raise money for MBC research, they also spread awareness, start conversations, and invite women to claim their innate goodness. I’m counting this fall as a rousing success because we did just that! For every shirt I sold, I had another meaningful conversation. People who have been touched by breast cancer in some way have shared their stories with me. I helped others learn about MBC, and I pray it also spread hope. I am humbled to be able to do that, and am so grateful that God put the pieces together.
A wild surprise this October was my speaking era! What? Yes! I was invited to speak at a women’s event for a church in Statesville, and I’m going to sound like a broken record, but it was a wonderful experience. I was nervous as I’d never done anything like that before. I shared my story, and about the healing God has brought in my heart and in my life. The women were so kind! At some point, I mentioned how I wished my speech therapist could see me speaking with them and how far I’ve come and they all cheered! The next day, I got a picture of all of them wearing their Still Good shirts. 🥰️ How special!! I said that I hoped my story would remind them 3 things:
We are first and foremost children of God.
His goodness is right here because He is here.
We can carry His love with us wherever we go!
I get teary-eyed to think that God can take something so yucky and dark like a cancer diagnosis to spread love to so many people! I really can’t believe that all of this is a part of my life. (Who is she??)
Top it all off, I was invited to three podcasts within a few weeks! You can listen here:
Every time I spoke, it got a little easier and smoother. My elevator pitch for Still Good Co. got shorter and less awkward. 😂 I gradually felt more comfortable. (It also helped that the podcast hosts were truly wonderful!)
After all that goodness, Andrew and I were invited to speak at a conference in Orlando, FL with Dr. Tan!! It was a big crowd, but Dr. Tan guided us through the whole thing. We shared about my experience with breast cancer, how it has affected my life, and what I hoped to share with others. This was a very different room from the church in Statesville! I’m so glad Andrew and I were able to share the same message in slightly different words: A cancer patient is a whole person, and soul healing is just as important as physical healing. We made another awesome memory with Dr. Tan, and overall it was- you guessed it- a great experience!
Andrew and I stayed in Orlando 3 more days to go to Disney World (pictures coming soon!) and it was lovely.
The Not So Wonderful
Well for starters, I brought home COVID from our fabulous vacation. 😂 Four years later, it finally got me! I’m feeling ok so far, just flu-ish symptoms, and mostly sad that it’s disrupting my life. Missing a week of school and church for Florida, now missing another week for illness, means that I really didn’t work much this month! While I feel irresponsible, like a slacker that should get back to it, I also recognize that my body really needs the rest. So…ok. I appreciate your grace with missing newsletters, podcasts, and social content, friends!
I learned that my dear friend, Stacy, passed away from MBC at the end of October. This really wrecked my heart. She is my third friend lost to MBC, but by far the closest. (I posted a little about that here!) It’s such a gift to make friends in dark places, but it’s also scary. Her passing reminded me how we met: a terrible diagnosis. We met in a support group during chemotherapy, and were so excited to learn we lived only 20 minutes apart. Our virtual coffee dates became real-life adventures and double dates, thankful for friends that really understand what we were experiencing. And now…she’s gone. I feel guilty for doing so well when she wasn’t. I feel heartbroken that her journey didn’t end in healing here on earth. I grieve for her husband and small children, and all those who loved her. It isn’t fair. MBC is cruel.
I was afraid our trip to Orlando would mean missing the funeral, but we made it! We flew in Friday night, and attended Stacy’s Celebration of Life Saturday afternoon. Being “cancer friends” is so hard. You meet people at their lowest, but they have a whole life outside of that disease. It was almost like mourning a whole different person, and I wished I could have meet her, too. I felt a little out of place, like a weird reminder of the bad things she faced. But…Andrew and I went, and hugged her husband, and told him how very sad we were. 💔
In addition, a check-up at the podiatrist ended with some minor surgery. 🤦♀️ I left with two very sad, uncomfortable big toes, feeling a familiar wave of defeat. My body is still not the same, even after so much progress after so much cancer treatment. But we carry on!
So overall, October was really wonderful until it wasn’t. Heartbreak mixed with the heartwarming. But isn’t that the way things go? I know that every good thing and answered prayer is a reminder that God is at work, and I cling to that in all the yucky moments, too. I pray you see Him at work around you today, too! ❤️️
PS- I’ll do a whole separate post about Disney! Coming soon!
